Collide
by Haleylovesyou39
Summary: After a fight with Robin, Starfire leaves him a note that reveals everything she truly thinks - and knows - about the Boy Wonder. The question is, can Robin stop her from leaving? R&R please!


_**Inspired by the song "Collide," by Howie Day. Seriously, listen to it. Even if you've already heard it, listen to it again. **_

"_**Out of the doubt that fills your mind. You finally find… you and I collide."  
~ Collide: Howie Day**_

Lunge. Dodge. Slide. Jump. Punch. Robin's instincts screamed at him, barking out commands rapidly as Starfire's body advanced towards his. Each move she made was as fluid and practiced as the last, and Robin rushed to avoid her flying limbs. She was good. He knew this, of course. Starfire possesed much more stamina and strength than most humans, and her quick mind only made for a double assault against the Boy Wonder.

Robin lunged for Starfire's shoulder, but she dodged his limb, grabbing his arm and flipping him over. He landed against the floor with a soft thud, letting out a sharp breath as his body connected with the blue training mat.

"I believe that is 2 for me, and none for you." Starfire said jokingly. She grabbed Robin's hand and pulled him to his feet.

"Yeah. You're getting a lot better, Star." Robin replied, rubbing the spot on his arm where Starfire had grabbed him. she smiled at him amusedly and grabbed a water bottle. Robin did the same, breathing deeply as the drink trickled down his throat.

"Shall we have another round of combat?" Starfire inquired, placing her hands on her bare hips. Her gray sports bra rose and fell with her chest, and her black leggings exposed her toned stomach. Robin gulped, suddenly requiring more water. Starfire ran her hand through her ponytail, and Robin rocked back and forth from foot to foot, weighing his options.

"I think we've had enough combat for now," Robin replied, sinking down to the floor. He beckoned for Starfire to sit with him; she complied, crossing her legs in front of her body. She sat up straight, still poised for attack. Robin placed his hand on her shoulder, and she relaxed, smiling as he brushed his fingertips over the exposed skin of her arm. He retraced the path his fingers had taken, moving them up to the side of her neck.

"Mmm," she breathed, and Robin retracted his arm quickly, realizing what he'd been doing.

"Why did you do that?" Starfire questioned, rubbing her neck against her shoulder.

"Sorry, I don't know what I was thinking."

"No, Robin, I meant why did you stop." She said, pulling his hand back to her shoulder. He groaned and stood up, ripping his wrist out of her grip.

"We can't do this, Starfire." Robin said, turning his back to her.

"Must you always be so stubborn?" Starfire stood up, gripping the back of her neck with her hand. She could feel her muscles knotting together beneath the skin.

"How am I stubborn? I'm trying to keep us safe. I'm trying to keep you safe."

"If keeping me safe is causing you to pull away from me, then perhaps I would rather be in danger."

"Don't talk like that, Star. You know who I am."

"No, Robin. I fear that I do not. I fear you are a person who I will never understand, because you will not let me in!" Starfire shouted, and Robin whirled on her, anger causing him to clench his hands into fists.

"Then maybe our problem is that you don't understand me."

"No, Robin. We do not have a problem. It is you who has the problem. You will not let anyone get close to you. You fear commitment, and you chase the life of a hero as if it is the only thing you've ever wanted."

"It is the only thing I've ever wanted." Robin snapped, and Starfire recoiled from the words, a deeper meaning lodging itself into her brain. But Robin didn't flinch as her eyes filled with tears, and he made no apologies as she cast her eyes to the floor in defeat.

"Then you have gotten what you wished for." Starfire mumbled, brushing past the Boy Wonder. He heard the door slam behind him, and he threw his arm towards the wall, punching it angrily. Blood trickled down his skin beneath his gloves, and he could feel his hand throbbing. But he ignored the pain, focusing instead on how it felt to be just a hero.

* * *

_Robin does not want you here._

_He does not care about you._

_He's better off without you._

_He doesn't want you._

Starfire's mind swam in her own hurtful thoughts, throbbing painfully inside her skull as she picked up her backpack. She glanced out across the midnight sky that surrounded Jump City like a dark bubble of serenity. There was no noise coming from the sleeping city, and even Titans' tower itself remained completely silent.

Starfire wracked her brain for happy thoughts, knowing she would need to fly to return home, but every corner of her mind was filled with a vision of Robin's angry expression.

Finally, Starfire found a happy memory, and closed her eyes, picturing the day she had become part of the Titans. This, at least, was enough to lift her feet into the air, and she floated into the air wordlessly, freezing for a moment as she looked at the roof of the Tower. She expected Robin to rush to the edge, asking her where she was going. In all honesty, Starfire wanted the Boy Wonder to come stop her. To tell her he wanted her to stay.

But Robin never came, and Starfire felt a single tear roll down her cheek as she flew away from the tower.

* * *

"Starfire, I'm sorry." Robin said for the umpteenth time. He'd been standing outside her door for thirty minutes, knocking on the door persistently. But Starfire never answered him, and he figured she would continue ignoring him until morning came. He sighed, turning to head to his room. At least in the morning, she would have to confront him. Maybe then he could talk to her. Maybe then she would listen.

Robin walked to his bed silently and collapsed onto the soft mattress. When he did, his head hit something that had been laid on his mattress, and he pulled it out from under him. He ran his hand over the crumpled paper, and stood up, back to his bedroom door as he unfolded it.

_Dear Robin,_

_I cannot possibly explain to you why I am writing this. Perhaps it would be best if I left without a word. But I realize that would not be fair to you, or to our friends. You each deserve an explanation. A reason why I will no longer be a Titan by the time you find this letter._

_After our fight today, I realized something: I do not wish to be a hero. Not if it means giving up the things and people I love. And that is exactly what you are saying the job entitles. Letting go of the most precious things that you have. Of course you'll always have the Titans as your friends... but is that really enough? Is it enough to have people there for you who know the Boy Wonder, but do not know Robin? How can they truly be your friends when they only have your back physically - not mentally and emotionally. Of course, this is only my opinion. Maybe you and the others do not share it. But I have been holding onto my hopes for too long. _

_I meant what I said that time when you became Red X. You do not trust us. Not in the ways that you should. You live under the same roof as us, yet you walk around acting like we should never be shown another side of you. You walk around acting like I should never be shown another side of you. _

_You have taught me many things since I came to this planet, Robin. The first thing you taught me was how to speak your language. Of course, you didn't realize that you were teaching me, but it was all the same to me. And then you taught me the meaning of home. I had once believed that Tamaran would always be my only home. It was, after all, the place in which I was born. But then I came here, and the meaning of the word home completely changed. You gave me a place where I felt safe, and let me into a team that loved me despite who I was. _

_And that team loves you, Robin. Despite the mistakes you've made... you have been a wonderful leader, and we each appreciate everything that you have done for us. That's another thing you've taught me: leadership. You showed me that sometimes, putting yourself last is the best option. When you truly care about someone, it doesn't matter what condition you are in. It just matters that they are safe; I believe this is how each of the Titans feel about one another. _

_But I have also learned things that you did not teach me. Things about you that you would never have told me yourself. For example, the fact that you keep your eyes hidden in order to shelter your emotions from the world. I know about how badly you want to impress your parents, and how far you have come in the process of reaching for that dream. I know that when you have nightmares, you talk in your sleep, and that you keep a picture of your parents in the top drawer beside your bed. _

_When you're upset, you take it out on yourself, which in turn causes your temper to flare. You're scared of commitment, yet you can chase after the same bad guy for months without tiring. And most importantly, you get lost in your own world self-hatred. You don't want to admit it, of course, but you blame yourself for what has happened in the past. This is understandable, but pushing the people who love you away... that is not. _

_Robin, I truly love you. You are my best friend. Have been since the day I came here, and I do not wish to loose sight of that, even after I'm gone. But I want so much more than to be just your friend. I don't want to sacrifice the way I feel any longer, simply because of your fears. I may be your weakness... but you are my strength Robin, and I have convinced myself that saying goodbye will hurt less than sticking around. _

_So, I leave you with a piece of advice: open yourself up. You never know who will surprise you, and show you what you've been missing out on your whole life. You may be a hero, but you are, after all, still a human being. _

_Love always,_

_Starfire_

Robin dropped the paper, disregarding the letter as he scrambled for the door to his room. His eyes burned from unshed tears, and he fumbled through the blury world around him. Is this what life without Starfire would be like? A blury mess of frustration and guilt? If so, Robin wanted no part of it. It was a world he couldn't live in. Up until now, Robin had truly believed that the most important things in his life had been ripped from his hands.

"Starfire!" Robin shouted, opening the door to his room. As if expecting him, she stood there, light from the hallway illuminating her tanned skin. Her eyes were cast towards the floor, and teardrops still clung to her long, dark eyelashes.

"I could not-" Starfire started, but Robin cut her off, pulling her into his room quickly and crushing her against him. She froze at the embrace, relaxing her muscles when Robin buried his head in her hair.

"I'm sorry, Star," He whispered, squeezing her tighter. Starfire let out a strangled sob and gripped him back, burying her head into his shoulder.

They remained like that for several moments, lost in each other's arms. At some point during the night, though neither knew when, they broke apart and ended up on Robin's bed, fast asleep in each other's arms, clinging to only thing they had left: eachother.

**A/N: yeah... I don't know where that one came from. I was in the car on the way back home (an 8 hour drive, I might add,) and I was listening to "Collide," one of my favorite songs of all time. And, well, I guess I was driven to write this story. And so I wrote it. Within 30 minutes I had it written, and I cleaned it up once I got home and had access to a computer. It's definitely not one my fluffy, sappy love stories that I've written... in fact, it's a bit more depressing than what I usually write. And writing a letter from Starfire was... new. But I like it. It's definitely a story that I'm willing to say I am proud of. **


End file.
